The Alchemist Diaries

“You can’t be afraid to burn everything down and start from scratch. Because the only direction you will go from there, is up. New opportunities will have no choice but to eventually open up for you.” ― Robin S. Baker

I was once in love with a very expensive yarn, heathered in shades of olive, moss, and bronze, and silky in texture as it slipped through my fingers. It was soft against the skin, like touching puppy fur and fleece. My desire was to knit a gorgeous knee length cardigan, complete with textured fabric and a leather tag with my custom label printed on the front. I was (and still am) working on a lifelong endeavor of self-made garments as a personal building project.

I had spent months carefully saving for the yarn, and carefully planning the yarn for my gauge. I had even knitted up several swatches in advance. I remember the day I started it clearly; I was up late watching Celine Dion closing the 2024 Paris Olympics Opening Ceremony. She was singing “Hymne A L’Amour” at the foot of the Eiffel Tower, and I was in absolute tears. To this day, I cannot go without crying if I listen to her sing that song because it encompassed the overall joy, excitement, love, perseverance, and triumph Dion expressed throughout all of the years of pain, fear, and suffering while overcoming debilitating struggles. She translated all of this through her voice, and still made it about the athletes who had experienced similar strife to be there in Paris. I honestly think about the idea of “starting over” every time I hear her sing this song.

Halfway through my exquisite cardigan, I found that it was not going quite right. The gauge was still off, forcing me to double the amount of yarn I needed to use. The heathered threads diluted the texture of the pattern. The drape was too stiff, even for a relatively thick yarn.

Finally, in 2025, I did something I had never done before: I frogged my entire knit project. In fact, I did not just frog one project. I frogged several. Hats. Cardigans. Sweaters. Frogging is the act of unraveling your knitted or crocheted work to fix a mistake or start a project over. It is often a painful decision because knitting and crocheting are labor intensive crafts that require massive amounts of time, planning, and details. Forty hours of work can become forty hours of your life gone within forty seconds of frogging.

However, that day I became somewhat more accepting of this. As artists, we eventually have to learn how to accept that it is okay to dismantle what we do not love. Personally, I sometimes wish to achieve perfection or worth through a project that is not good enough―by this, I mean, a project that is poorly executed. When it comes to knitting and crocheting, I typically avoid frogging, but the reality is that it makes no sense to continue making a piece of clothing that I know I will never wear. Sometimes it is necessary to frog especially with the following issues:

1. Making mistakes while stitching
2. Issues with the size
3. Wrong yarn choice
4. Issues with the gauge
5. Dissatisfaction with the overall design

Noticeable mistakes involving dropped stitches, incorrect pattern repetition, and uneven tension can disrupt the flow and appearance of the final project. Other times, the project does not match the intended size. Colors may clash with the pattern texture (as is what happened to me). The gauge may not match the finished measurements. All of these can lead to our dissatisfaction with the overall item.

To be clear, we do not have to frog until we are 100% satisfied with our work (unless you really want to and it does not drive you insane). There is a fine line between dissatisfaction and seeking perfection. We can frog to fix understandable mistakes. Oftentimes, our “good enough” work in the grand scheme of things is actually a work of art.

Eventually, I did remake the cardigan using far more suitable yarn, Kelbourne Woolens Germantown Bulky in olive (note, as I write this it is in the process of being discontinued).

And guess, what? After making, I shrank it in the dryer during a routine blocking session.

It is still wearable, but it is time to start over again.

Daily writing prompt

Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

View all responses